Not A Mother’s Day

Today has been challenging more years than I care to recall,
I would spend most of the morning trying to not crumble and bawl.

Everyone woman around me had at least one child to call her mother,
But I had an emptiness that could not be filled by the love of any other.

Family would smile at me and say, “you have a dog; you’re a mom of a sort”,
As if that was the same, I’d roll my eyes and attempt to give a sassy retort.

I could not focus on all of the good; appreciating everything I had,
Like the support of strong and caring women; so I just harped on the bad.

For a long time I suffered as many told me that my glorious day would come,
It seemed like everyone was pregnant with twins and my uterus was dumb.

So, yes, today I get to rejoice with all moms: some okay and some first rate,
But it is still difficult for me to fully embrace the day I waited too long to celebrate.

I am thinking of those that have lost theirs to death or there is just no relationship,
To those that wish desperately as I did to become one, and cannot be happy or get a grip.

Thus, my challenge to myself and all of you that are not traditional moms on this day,
Celebrate something truly special about yourself and do not fall into dismay.

Because I can tell you that if I could do it all again-to relive it with arms open wide,
I would do a better job honoring those around me and to fully enjoy the ride.

 

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